Heads up!

Fading star Ben Affleck was forced to pull out of a poker tournament earlier this week because he was suffering from an agonizing migraine due to the size of his massive head. Doctors have reported that Affleck's head is 3 1/2 inches larger than the average size cranium. Doctors continue to report that even though Affleck's head is freakishly larger than the average person's head, in no way does that make him smarter or even the least bit capable of producing a clear coherent thought.

Famous Oscar winning screenwriter William Goldman says, "You should have seen the original script that was given to me for 'Good Will Hunting'. The script consisted of a bunch of cocktail napkins folded together with a binder clip. I could make out a few words such as Boston and apples, the rest was illegible. Oh, there was also a stick figure drawing on napkin three that had a giant head, which I assumed was Ben, and it was farting on a frog. I assumed the frog was Matt but at that point it just didn't matter. The studio paid me a ton of money to write an Oscar winning screenplay and not put my name on it and that's exactly what I did. Thank you."

The "Paycheck" star was due to compete at the World Series of Poker 'Ante Up for Africa' event but he had to scrap his entry after learning his head can't stop growing. Affleck has said to be seen renting the movie 'Mask', reports the useless New York Post gossip column PageSix.

Affleck also tells the horrible publication, "This is the one poker event I go to each year, and I didn't even get to play. My wife (Jennifer Gardner) flew in just to see it and boy are her ears tired! I'm just kidding but she does have Dumbo ears."

He wasn't the only box office poison celebrity taking part in the event - "American Pie" actress Shannon Elizabeth came second in the tournament right behind an unused deck of cards.