Rebecca Romijn Stamos O'Connell Romijn is relishing her last names and the break she gets from her twin babies on the set of her new soon to be failed TV show "Eastwick" - because they took her "for granted" when she was a stay at home mum with a nanny. She said, "Those new borns had no idea what my nanny did for them. I mean the nanny fed them, cleaned them and held them. I bet they think that's normal. They probably think every new born that can't walk or speak yet has a nanny that will do that stuff for them. Just them wait until my nanny is not doing that anymore for them! I say 6 months of that is too much and they can fend for themselves!" Rebecca Romijn Stamos O'Connell Romijn then continued to build a play fort for her twins out of the "Roller Ball", "Femme Fatale", "The Punisher", "God Send" and "Pepper Dennis" scripts.
After nursing Dolly and Charlie for six months, Romijn swapped places with her completely emasculated husband Jerry O'Connell so she could return to work on the new horrible witch-themed drama. The TV show is so bad that Jack Nicholson is taking the film "Witches of Eastwick" off his filmography. Jack said, "The thought of Rebecca Romijn Stamos O'Connell Romijn acting in a TV show that has the partial name of one of my movies from 25 years ago is enough for me to believe that movie never existed."
"And her relationship with her babies is better than ever!" Says the out of work ex-bachelor Charlie O'Connell.
The actress tells the hitless website Starpulse.com, "My nanny was with them right up until they were six months which is when we started shooting, and I felt like they kind of took my nanny for granted a little bit, like Jerry'd walk in, or was it Charlie? I can't tell them apart! Anyways, Jerry or Charlie would walk in and they'd be like, 'Ahhh.' But then they never even noticed that it was my nanny with them the whole time. My nanny was a milk machine. I felt like that's all she was to them, just this walking milk machine." The out of work Charlie O'Connell says, "The kids' first words were actually, "You are a stupid model mommy. You can't act. Charlie O'Connell's work in the TV show 'Sliders' was great!" Charlie O'Connell continued, "Well, I actually made the last part up but the first part is true."
Romijn Stamos O'Connell Romijn continued saying, "How in the world do I keep getting acting jobs? But none the less, now that I'm not there as many hours during the day, they're pretty clingy and I have to say I love it. It's the best feeling in the world to be wanted, especially for bad movies and TV shows."
Monday, September 28, 2009
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Fancy Feast of Money
Box office poison Charlize Theron is ready to sink her claws into another way too long for its own good "Batman" movie - she's desperate to take on the role of Catwoman and be in her first hit movie in years. Charlize says, "I guess having an Oscar doesn't mean that much."
Several annoying actresses, including Megan Fox, Angelina Jolie and Ashley Judd, have been tipped to step into the famous catsuit, although Hollywood bosses, who are mostly just family members of previously famous people, have announced there isn't even a script in the works for the superhero sequel yet but the movie is done and ready to hit theaters tomorrow. Hollywood boss #43 said, "We need a script?".
But Theron insists she'd love the chance to transform into the feline femme fatale or just transform into a "Transformer" because she said, "That would be so cool.". She is offering her name up for casting directors and having her actor boyfriend, turned bad director, Stuart Townsend drive her to all casting director offices. He will then dust and clean her stacks of thousand dollar bills and wait for his weekly allowance.
She says, "I think what has happened to that franchise is amazing, like the cure for Polio or like the first moon landing. Seriously, (Batman filmmaker) Chris Nolan is a genius, just like Rob Zombie or lets say Adam Rich. I would be an idiot to not consider that part. But then again I was in "Children of the Corn III", "Trail and Error", "Mighty Joe Young", "The Astronauts Wife", "Reindeer Games", "The Yards", "The Legend of Bagger Vance", "Sweet November", "Trapped", a bunch of other crap, and "Eon Flux". So I don't know."
Several annoying actresses, including Megan Fox, Angelina Jolie and Ashley Judd, have been tipped to step into the famous catsuit, although Hollywood bosses, who are mostly just family members of previously famous people, have announced there isn't even a script in the works for the superhero sequel yet but the movie is done and ready to hit theaters tomorrow. Hollywood boss #43 said, "We need a script?".
But Theron insists she'd love the chance to transform into the feline femme fatale or just transform into a "Transformer" because she said, "That would be so cool.". She is offering her name up for casting directors and having her actor boyfriend, turned bad director, Stuart Townsend drive her to all casting director offices. He will then dust and clean her stacks of thousand dollar bills and wait for his weekly allowance.
She says, "I think what has happened to that franchise is amazing, like the cure for Polio or like the first moon landing. Seriously, (Batman filmmaker) Chris Nolan is a genius, just like Rob Zombie or lets say Adam Rich. I would be an idiot to not consider that part. But then again I was in "Children of the Corn III", "Trail and Error", "Mighty Joe Young", "The Astronauts Wife", "Reindeer Games", "The Yards", "The Legend of Bagger Vance", "Sweet November", "Trapped", a bunch of other crap, and "Eon Flux". So I don't know."
Thursday, September 17, 2009
30 Days Can Fix Anything in Hollywood
Carpet cranium icon Burt Reynolds has been discharged from a drug rehabilitation centre following treatment for his addiction to painkillers and rug cleaner.
The faded 73-year-old actor was admitted to the Hanley Center in Florida last month after a nasty fall from stardom and at his waterfront mansion in Hobe Sound led him to realize he'd become "a prisoner of prescription pain pills and Reslove carpet cleaner".
According to the fake magazine National Enquirer, the "Stroker Ace" star agreed to undergo a mustache trimming and a 30-day rehab programme after doctors raised fears for his mental health in the aftermath of the accident and his role as Boss Hogg in the "Dukes of Hazzard" movie.
The actor has previously confessed to a reliance on face work and sleeping aid Halcion after turning to the drug to ease the terrible pain he felt from living with Loni Anderson and temporomandibular joint disorder (TMJ) in the 1980s.
Reynolds' manager, Erik Kritzer, confirmed the rehab stint, insisting the star relapsed after watching "Cop and 1/2" and undergoing painful surgery on his back and "checked himself into rehab in order to regain control of his life."
Kritzer also revealed Reynolds has now left the facility, but no further details were given. Dear friend, Charles Nelson Reilly, could not be reached for comment because he is dead.
The faded 73-year-old actor was admitted to the Hanley Center in Florida last month after a nasty fall from stardom and at his waterfront mansion in Hobe Sound led him to realize he'd become "a prisoner of prescription pain pills and Reslove carpet cleaner".
According to the fake magazine National Enquirer, the "Stroker Ace" star agreed to undergo a mustache trimming and a 30-day rehab programme after doctors raised fears for his mental health in the aftermath of the accident and his role as Boss Hogg in the "Dukes of Hazzard" movie.
The actor has previously confessed to a reliance on face work and sleeping aid Halcion after turning to the drug to ease the terrible pain he felt from living with Loni Anderson and temporomandibular joint disorder (TMJ) in the 1980s.
Reynolds' manager, Erik Kritzer, confirmed the rehab stint, insisting the star relapsed after watching "Cop and 1/2" and undergoing painful surgery on his back and "checked himself into rehab in order to regain control of his life."
Kritzer also revealed Reynolds has now left the facility, but no further details were given. Dear friend, Charles Nelson Reilly, could not be reached for comment because he is dead.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Carrey and McCarthy Sitting in a Tree....
Way past his prime Jim Carrey and longtime talentless girlfriend Jenny McCarthy have pledged their dedication to one another in a special commitment ceremony in Malibu, California, in hopes to keep their names in the media.
The "Once Bitten" star, 47, has been dating nude model-turned-bad actress McCarthy since 2005, which is just around the time Carrey's star status started to fall. But the couple has celebrated their love by promising to be together forever in a small, intimate ceremony in front of friends and family earlier this month. A guest at the ceremony said, "I have absolutely no idea what is going on here. I think he gave her a promise ring. A promise ring. Really? Come on now."
A source tells the absolutely useless National Enquirer, "The vows basically said that they would 'be forever in love' with one another and that they would always be together." In a continued attempt to act like they are still in high school, after the ceremony Carrey proceeded to finger bang McCarthy in the back of his car in the parking lot while she gave him a handy.
Sources say, "For the two of them, it was as good as a marriage ceremony. Except it's not."
The stars then jetted off to Las Vegas for a mini honeymoon-style holiday: They stayed at the Fantasy Tower in a luxury Sky Villa suite. Which was surely paid for by McCarthy from her stunning performance in "Witless Protection".
Carrey, who has previously been wed twice, has previously dismissed the idea of making McCarthy his wife, insisting marriage would spoil their close bond and his bank account.
An insider added, "He insists that he and Jenny are incredibly medicated and they don't want to jinx things by tying the knot. Jim says he doesn't need a legal ceremony or a piece of paper and Jenny feels the same. That is until she wants kids with him or he needs someone legally obligated to take care of him after his final mental breakdown."
The couple recently revealed there would be new additions to the family - they are formally adopting Emanuelle Lewis and one of the dogs that was in "Air Bud".
McCarthy, 36, has a seven-year-old son, Evan, from her previous relationship with the guy who played Gary Wallace on "Weird Science" the TV show.
The "Once Bitten" star, 47, has been dating nude model-turned-bad actress McCarthy since 2005, which is just around the time Carrey's star status started to fall. But the couple has celebrated their love by promising to be together forever in a small, intimate ceremony in front of friends and family earlier this month. A guest at the ceremony said, "I have absolutely no idea what is going on here. I think he gave her a promise ring. A promise ring. Really? Come on now."
A source tells the absolutely useless National Enquirer, "The vows basically said that they would 'be forever in love' with one another and that they would always be together." In a continued attempt to act like they are still in high school, after the ceremony Carrey proceeded to finger bang McCarthy in the back of his car in the parking lot while she gave him a handy.
Sources say, "For the two of them, it was as good as a marriage ceremony. Except it's not."
The stars then jetted off to Las Vegas for a mini honeymoon-style holiday: They stayed at the Fantasy Tower in a luxury Sky Villa suite. Which was surely paid for by McCarthy from her stunning performance in "Witless Protection".
Carrey, who has previously been wed twice, has previously dismissed the idea of making McCarthy his wife, insisting marriage would spoil their close bond and his bank account.
An insider added, "He insists that he and Jenny are incredibly medicated and they don't want to jinx things by tying the knot. Jim says he doesn't need a legal ceremony or a piece of paper and Jenny feels the same. That is until she wants kids with him or he needs someone legally obligated to take care of him after his final mental breakdown."
The couple recently revealed there would be new additions to the family - they are formally adopting Emanuelle Lewis and one of the dogs that was in "Air Bud".
McCarthy, 36, has a seven-year-old son, Evan, from her previous relationship with the guy who played Gary Wallace on "Weird Science" the TV show.
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
"The Simple Life"- Starring Whitney Houston?
Whitney "We have a problem" Houston gave up a dream as a fruit drinks seller in paradise to make a musical comeback. Was this an actual dream or just a hallucination from another massive coke binge? We'll never know but...
In an exclusively boring TV interview with Oprah Winfrey, the crazy singer says, “Yep, a fruit stand and selling some fruit drinks to some people… Me and my daughter living on an island with a beach. I wouldn't want to live on an island without a beach unless that island possessed a real cool picture of a beach... Yes indeed, living the simple life with lots and lots of money and coke. You know, the simple life."
Whitney babbled on, “You’ve gotta understand I had been all around the the world or at least I think I have…I can't remember. Anyway, I had done it all at that point in time. Even my ground bending role as Rita on 'Gimme a Break'. I mean how can you top that? However, I wasn’t remembering the gift that God had given me. The gift of doing very large amounts of crack cocaine. But I'll tell ya...crack is whack!! I forgot I had a voice. I had totally kinda put that aside…”
And it took a powerful men to convince her otherwise. Whitney’s music mentor Bruce Willis and American record producer Clive Davis were having none of it, urging her to give up her Del Monte dreams – and get back to work.
So our Whitney got back into the studio with the best auto voice tuner technology available and she’s back with a fantastic new hit album, which stormed to the top of the U.S. charts last week. In related news, Bobby Brown stormed the top of the U.S Capital Building because he once saw it in a picture and said, "I got get me some of that!"
In an exclusively boring TV interview with Oprah Winfrey, the crazy singer says, “Yep, a fruit stand and selling some fruit drinks to some people… Me and my daughter living on an island with a beach. I wouldn't want to live on an island without a beach unless that island possessed a real cool picture of a beach... Yes indeed, living the simple life with lots and lots of money and coke. You know, the simple life."
Whitney babbled on, “You’ve gotta understand I had been all around the the world or at least I think I have…I can't remember. Anyway, I had done it all at that point in time. Even my ground bending role as Rita on 'Gimme a Break'. I mean how can you top that? However, I wasn’t remembering the gift that God had given me. The gift of doing very large amounts of crack cocaine. But I'll tell ya...crack is whack!! I forgot I had a voice. I had totally kinda put that aside…”
And it took a powerful men to convince her otherwise. Whitney’s music mentor Bruce Willis and American record producer Clive Davis were having none of it, urging her to give up her Del Monte dreams – and get back to work.
So our Whitney got back into the studio with the best auto voice tuner technology available and she’s back with a fantastic new hit album, which stormed to the top of the U.S. charts last week. In related news, Bobby Brown stormed the top of the U.S Capital Building because he once saw it in a picture and said, "I got get me some of that!"
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Katherine and Josh order some take-out
Katherine Heigl has confirmed reports she and husband Josh Kelley's perfectly waxed eyebrows are to adopt – and the actress has shown her caring side by not beating the hell out of the production assistants on the Grey's Anatomy set and by revealing the Korean baby has special needs. Just like Josh Kelley's five-o'clock shadow. Josh Kelley is currently writing a pussy rock opera about it. It will be available for free download on his Friendster page.
The couple began the process six months ago but have yet to meet little Naleigh – who has been named after the actress’ mother, Nancy, and sister, Leigh. When asked why they didn't name the child after any of the woman on Josh's side of the family Heigl said, "Josh who?".
The super B-level couple have already headed off any accusations Heigl has taken the easy route to parenthood. In a statement released by Josh Kelley's five-o'clock shadow it said, "Katherine and Josh have not shared a bed since they hooked up on the set of Josh's video that no one saw. Katherine is busy with bad movies and Josh needs to constantly maintain me with various electric shavers and oils. So adopting an Asian baby with special needs just made sense."
Heigl went on to say, “They sent us a picture. They told us that it was a little girl and who she was and the information about six months ago. Six months after that we realized that the picture was actually a baseball card of Steve Garvey. We then received the correct picture. She looked so beautiful on her Hoveround Scooter. She is a special needs baby and because of that it all moved so much faster. They wanted to get her to us as quickly as possible. And with the Hoveround Scooter it was not a problem at all. Have you seen those things? They are sneaky fast!”
The couple began the process six months ago but have yet to meet little Naleigh – who has been named after the actress’ mother, Nancy, and sister, Leigh. When asked why they didn't name the child after any of the woman on Josh's side of the family Heigl said, "Josh who?".
The super B-level couple have already headed off any accusations Heigl has taken the easy route to parenthood. In a statement released by Josh Kelley's five-o'clock shadow it said, "Katherine and Josh have not shared a bed since they hooked up on the set of Josh's video that no one saw. Katherine is busy with bad movies and Josh needs to constantly maintain me with various electric shavers and oils. So adopting an Asian baby with special needs just made sense."
Heigl went on to say, “They sent us a picture. They told us that it was a little girl and who she was and the information about six months ago. Six months after that we realized that the picture was actually a baseball card of Steve Garvey. We then received the correct picture. She looked so beautiful on her Hoveround Scooter. She is a special needs baby and because of that it all moved so much faster. They wanted to get her to us as quickly as possible. And with the Hoveround Scooter it was not a problem at all. Have you seen those things? They are sneaky fast!”
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